buzzydr

i dontknow how i should start… a lot of thing in my mind but i dont have any idea how could i deliver my thought so that everyone who read this would appreciate ur life ur family….

in a woman’s life, usually consist of her husband kids and parents( if still alive)… sibling? naaaa it is not really involve when u r married…

schizophrenia…. it is a disaster when it strucks a woman life….  most of women have paranoid schizophrenia… and here start the sad story, she will start having delusion…. usually bad thing about her husband… either her husband having an affair or the most pethatic her husband divorce her…. what ever it is she will start develop hatred toward her husband…. what ever explanation given by her husband, everything is fake… (hem that y we call it delusion.. fix false believe) she will preoccupied with her own delusion, her new life… heck patient always describe it as dilahirkan semula or reborn with new life…. she forgets that she loves her husband more than her life before… but today… everything change… this world belongs to her and her delusion soul mate….

when u clerk them, u maybe feel like laughing… u know that the delusions are all rubbish… example, when she said she married with a singer or minister or who ever he is and hate her husband damnly…. u just accept it.. write in ur log book and go out from the ward….

do u ever think about her husband? her family? naaa….it isnt important… i m not suppose to get involved into the family affair… yup it is totally truth… but y dont u observe at least once…. so that u can learn something….

today i have the opportunity… to take a glimpse of a meeting between my patient and her husband and family… the patient smile and shake her sister’s hand but when her sister asked to do the same to her husband… she turned away and entere the ward with angry face…not even a smile for her husband… i know i m really a busy body doctor… i rush packed my things and left the ward so that i can see her husband… and i did… i could see how miserable he is… he looked so sad.. hopeless… and confuse

then i realized… how pity that woman… she lost something meaningful in her life… she now in her delusion… without knowing that some1 out there waiting for her….

actually… i have many other sad story about schizophrenia… this illness really terrible… some1 can lose his or her life in a glimpse…. 

ayah aku cakap aku ni tak der tallent nak kaya

betul ker?

kadang2 aku rasa memang betul pun

hahahhaaaha

contohnya….. belum dapat duit MARA labtop aku dah pecah….

belum cashkan duit spec aku dah hilang….

haahahahahaahaha

n belum lagi nak gi jumpa doktor sebab jeraway yang menggatal memenuhi muka aku….

eh aku dah cakap ker yang muka aku now dah penuh jerawat?

aduh rasa macam zaman muda lak… hehehe macam msa kecik2 dulu rasa sakit bila nak solat n geram nak letup2 kan jerawat tu

tapi aku rasa this time even worst….

this month my father’s birthday…. n bcoz aku dah dapat increment duit bulanan aku dipotong sempena my father’s burday…. so sad kan….

hai….biler nak kaya ni…..

hehehehhe

waduh, sudah mula kuliyah, bagaimana ya? after three weeks coming back to IMU i still having headache with my study, people around me and yeah all that psychiatry patient… belive it or not the psychiatry patient also affect my mood, my way of thinking and and emotion… some more with all new terms make me thing that silap2 hari i would become one of them…. hehehehe….

everything started during two weeks break, at first my pimples flare up and yeah covered most area of my face… n the biggest disaster was i stepped on my labtop and it was broken and i had to make loan from my beloved money more than 1 k to fix it up…eventhough i got the increment n what ever money from MARA still it seemed nothing to me as i have to pay my mother…. until my dad said that he still looking any sign that i can be rich… huhuhu ayah so bad la u……yelah everyone else got that money plan to save it in the bank and etc while me? i had to safe into nec company bank….waawawa…… previously when i got the books alaunce i couldnt save cause i had to upgrade my pda and change new batery and it all cost me around 300 plus… wawa i think it is true that i will never be rich… kuang kuang kuang….

my new house…? hem… i like my room so much… i can bergolek2 on the floor as i have enough space to do so… i dont care wht other comment about thefurniture arrangement or what so ever… for me the most important i like my room then ever…. other than that? dont ask me as u got the answer